Thursday, September 5, 2013

A Buggy Tale

I posted this story on our Ravelry group and because not everyone is on Ravelry (poor souls), I'm posting it here too. We were discussing bugs and all their virtues (HA!) at knitting on Tuesday, then this happened:

After last nights conversation (and much laughter) about bugs and how they REALLY bug me, I had to tell you what happened last night when I got home.
Rox was the driver last night, and fine job she did too. I got out of the car to a dark porch which isn’t a bad thing because it does keep the bug population down (you know how they love that light). So I scrambled to get the door unlocked and open because you KNOW there are bugs just waiting for me!
No worries…got inside unharmed (and un-crawled-upon).
Fast foward to “getting ready for bed” time: I’m in the bathroom, sitting on the toilet (tmi?) and I see a bug in the shower which is directly in front of me. After closer inspection I think it’s some kind of large ant (yeah, I say to myself, another weird Maryland bug) so I leave it alone, knowing Mike will be upstairs any minute to rescue me. If he weren’t home I would have got a shoe (biggest and baddest I could find) and squashed it pronto. So I turn my bad to the shower (first mistake) and start brushing my teeth. Here comes the bug, flying at me! Ok, so maybe not AT me but pretty darn close! Not only can it fly but I’m pretty sure it had a yellow and black striped butt in the fraction of a second I saw it before flying out the bathroom door, slamming the door behind me. (second mistake) Whew…escaped death!
I finish brushing my teeth in the hall bath and proceed to wait for Mike to return from walking Gracie. It took a while, Gracie’s tummy has been disagreeable the last couple days, but he finally shows up and I point to the bathroom door and say, “BUG! Maybe a BEE!” He is very calm. He opens the door, walks in and closes the door behind him. Brave man I married. A few minutes later he comes out and says, “I can’t find it.” I say, “I can’t sleep with a bee!”
More looking…“I just don’t see it.”
“I can’t sleep with a BEE!”
More looking…”I’ve looked everywhere.”
“I can’t SLEEP with a BEE!”
“OK”, he says, “Let’s read for a while and I’ll look again.”
You can imagine…I had visions of this bee flying into the bedroom at night stalking me…or with the bathroom door closed, crawling under the door…you who don’t like bugs either can imagine the many, many ways in which bugs plot to GET us. Well, I can.
Scratching at the bedroom door…it’s Gracie who wants out again (tummy troubles). So after another walk, Mike tries to find the bug again.
There is a happy ending (and sleep for me); the bee flies out and Mike catches him and gives him a nice swim in the bathroom pool…otherwise known as the toilet. Whew!
So the answer to the questions posed to me last night… 
Yes, I confess, I am a bug-a-phobe. But out in the world I shall go, heart beating faster, in fear of other bug-attacks…until the weather turns too cold for those darn creepy crawlers (and flyers)!
(And thanks by the way…for the listen!)

No comments:

Post a Comment